All of us are crazy in different ways. We’re distinctively neurotic, unbalanced and immature, but don’t know quite the details, since no one ever encourages us too hard to find them out. An urgent and primary task of any lover is therefore to get a handle on the specific ways in which their partners are mad. They have to get up to speed on their individual neuroses. They have to grasp where these have come from– and most importantly, what sort of people either provoke or assuage them. A good partnership is not so much one between two healthy people (there aren’t many of these on the planet), instead it’s one between two demented people who have the skill or luck to find a non-threatening conscious accommodation between their relative insanities.
Yes I put a lot of this out to luck. Why you ask? Because there’s an epidemic of settling in this generation, especially women. Women everywhere are dipping far below their standards just to find men who appreciate them. They are giving up things they thought they wanted for nothing more than a simple “he’s good to me.” Where’s the man who was supposed to challenge you and understand you? Where’s the man who was supposed to shock you and support you?
Judging from the notion that male egos aren’t deflating at the same rate at which women are increasing their education, there’s an uneven scale here. Women are getting smarter, but men aren’t getting more supportive. Most people like to be the better one in the relationship. Men have been taught or conditioned to believe they are superior, when a woman shows a competitive edge, he becomes threatened.
A woman is settling when she stops thinking that she deserves better.I believe that almost every woman, at least once in her life, has settled for a man who didn’t deserve her. A man who didn’t appreciate her, respect her or even look her way. A man who wasn’t smart enough, strong enough or kind enough to even be in the same room as her. A man who didn’t deserve the opportunity to touch her, let alone to know her. A man who took his opportunity and threw it right in her face.
I feel sorry for such men. Because this girl overlooks all the flaws in the guys they’re with- their temper, their selfishness, their inability to love anyone beside themselves. This amazing woman could have anyone in the world she wants, but she still chose you. Every time. Over everyone else. But all you are now is a scar on her chest, a memory that fades faster than your photograph. And maybe now that you as a parasite are out of her, she will find someone who will love her and treat her like a queen. Instead of her being with someone who was never satisfied, even with her heart in his greedy hands.
Ladies, you aren’t completely right either though. Stop running after such men. You know they aren’t good for you and yet you pine away for them. Do you just like feeling downtrodden? If you do, then you need some psychological help. And if you don’t, then why are you running after such men? Stop settling and learn to be happy just the way you are. If our fathers treat us like princesses, the loves of our lives are supposed to treat us like queens.
The way a man treats the woman he’s with is a reflection of his upbringing. One can fool ones friends, co-workers and miraculously, more often than not, even ourselves. But how do you fool someone who you claim to love?
“I act for a living, you do not”- Leonardo DiCaprio